These Ain’t No Fairytales: The George Martorano Stories

Experience the captivating tales of George Martorano and the songs of Maria Merlino in this Film. But that’s not all! We’re also developing an American lager: Mugshot and a Light German Pilsner : Skinny Joey’s Light Beer for our eponymously named brewery, These Ain’t No Fairytales.

About us

We love South Philadelphia!

The People behind the scene

Meet our team

A collective of innovative minds and spirited individuals, committed to bringing their best in a dynamic and supportive workspace.

Maria Merlino

Founder & CEO

George Martorano

Founder & CEO

Here is a bit of fun. What if movies were beers?

Here are some clever movie titles that playfully incorporate beer:

  1. “Hops Fiction”: A beer-centric twist on the classic “Pulp Fiction.”
  2. “The Brew Lebowski”: A nod to “The Big Lebowski,” with a beer-loving protagonist.
  3. “Ale-n”: A sci-fi thriller about extraterrestrial beer enthusiasts.
  4. “Brews Brothers”: A comedy following two beer-brewing siblings.
  5. “The Lager of the Rings”: Frodo embarks on a quest for the ultimate brew.
  6. “Beer Wars: Episode IV – A New Pint”: A galactic battle over the best beer recipe.
  7. “The Hoptimist”: A heartwarming tale of a beer lover’s optimism.
  8. “Brewtopia”: A utopian society fueled by craft beer.
  9. “The Malternative”: A noir mystery set in a beer-filled speakeasy.
  10. “The Brew-sual Suspects”: A group of beer aficionados with a secret.

Feel free to grab a cold one and enjoy these fictional brews! 🍻

Do you accept reservations?

Yes, we accept reservations. Please call us or book online through our website.

What are your operating hours?

We are open from 8 AM to 6 PM, Monday to Saturday. We’re closed on Sunday. Holiday hours may vary, so please call or check our website for specific information on those dates.

Do you have vegetarian, vegan, or other special dietary options?

Yes, we offer an array of vegetarian, vegan, and gluten-free options. If you have other dietary requirements, please inform your server, and we’ll do our best to accommodate you.

Is parking available at the restaurant?

Yes, we have a parking lot adjacent to the restaurant, and street parking is also available. Valet parking is offered on weekends.

Can I order food for takeout or delivery?

Absolutely! You can order online through our website or by calling us. We offer both takeout and delivery within a specific radius.

These Ain’t No Fairytales is the work of George Martorano and Maria Merlino. Maria is an Executive Producer and George is Talent. We have created a film called These Ain’t No Fairytales: The George Martorano Stories. In addition, we have created a recipe for a special beer.

5 stars

John Doe

2 months ago

Great film and amazing beers!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Christine Yetzy

Testimonial from

I loved the film and the beers were delicious!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Michael Rago

Testimonial from

These Ain’t No Fairytales tells the tale of a man and his journey through life.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Frank DiSipio

Testimonial

WOW! What a wonderful show. Thanks for the beer!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

John Zammbriano